Wondering why you should ask about your family's peace of mind?
"Why would I want to ask them that?" That's how Frank responded to the idea of asking his wife and young adult daughter how much peace of mind they have around his planning.
"I've got everything set up," he explained.
"They don't have to worry." The question for Frank is, "Why wouldn't you ask them about their peace of mind?" This is especially true if he believes they don't have to worry.
Planners often forget that the purpose of their planning isn't only "to have everything set up." It is also to bring your family peace of mind about what will happen if you are gone.
By asking about peace of mind, you can tap into a sentiment that intuitively captures both their thinking and feelings about the planning process.
Research confirms that peace of mind is an important topic in families.
The Later-in-Life Conversations Study found that peace of mind was the most relevant topic for the next generation and the second most relevant topic for the senior generation.
Exploring someone's sentiments on a topic is a simple way to say "I care about you." Here's how you can ask your family about their peace of mind.
Avoid judging someone's sentiments-the goal is to understand their perspective, not to agree.
Like Frank, you may have some resistance to asking family members about their peace of mind.
But it's a question that quickly gets at people's conscious or unconscious sentiments around planning.
Everyone has a peace of mind number that pops into their head, even if they may not initially understand the value of talking about it.
The goal of planning is to bring our family peace of mind, not just for us to feel good about our plan.
Get started Asking about peace of mind can help us start conversations about planning topics that may feel complex or daunting.
Senior generation Even if you don't feel ready to talk about your whole plan, you can ask about peace of mind to surface topics of interest for future conversations.
Next generation When your parents ask about your peace of mind, don't push for more answers than they are comfortable giving right now.